(Okay, not quite right but close enough for college corpseball…)
Ah yes, here’s one for the Devil’s Book of Records…
You know, how you will have, from time to time, what’s very euphemistically called ‘One of those days.’ The kind of day you feel Friday 13 has fallen on a Monday.
The stuff Country & Western singers croon about – when your wife has eloped with your prize winning Schnautzer, your car has been repossessed by the great God Cthulhu and you wake up, finding that your last handful of hair has turned white overnight and is spread out over your pillow like a bunch of dead flowers, lying on the grave of your great-aunt Flossie, who didn’t leave you her many, many millions of dollars, after all.
We all have them: Them days that prove that God exists and has it in for us – and believe me, Chinese student Wu Dan and the bicycle he rode in on know exactly what I mean:
“A cyclist was knocked out after being hit by a corpse thrown from a speeding car. Student Wu Dan, 16, was riding home when the incident happened. His uncle Yun Tsui said: “A car passed and a package came flying out the door. It had a dead woman inside. My nephew was very upset.” Police believe she was the victim of a car accident and was being dumped by the driver who had hit her in Dongyang, eastern China.”
Still, it only goes to show, once again, that you have to be very, very careful with the things you wish for.
All over the whole bloody world, sixteen years’ old males get up, each and every day, hoping, nay, praying that this will be the day that some female – any actual, flesh & blood female – will hit on them…
…and young Wu Dan is the one whose prayers get answered by a God Who’s been watching too many Eddy Murphy movies.
(Yes, I know I’ve done this clip before but it’s hard to think of anything more fitting here, so sue me…)