News Roundup for 3/18/09

Obama and Bush at White House
Pictured l. to r.; President Obama, guy who promises to shut the hell up

-Headline of the day-
"Bush: ‘I want the President to succeed.’"

Unlike Dick Cheney, former president George W. Bush isn't attacking current president Barack Obama. Bush said that Obama "deserves my silence and if he wants my help he can pick up the phone and call me."

I wouldn't wait by the phone, George.

He also addressed the "we all want Obama to fail" fad that's been making the rounds of Washington lately. "I want the President to succeed," Bush said. "I love my country a lot more than I love politics... I’m not going to spend my time criticizing him. There are plenty of critics in that arena."

You know what this means, don't you? Bush is going to have to apologize to Rush Limbaugh. (Think Progress)

-Fun with O'Reilly guests-
Bernie Goldberg, author of A Slobbering Love Affair: The True (And Pathetic) Story of the Torrid Romance Between Barack Obama and the Mainstream Media appeared on Bill O'Reilly's No Factor Spin Zone to defend comedian Jackie Mason's use of the Yiddish word "shvartze" to refer to Barack Obama.

"The word 'shvartze' is not a bad word," Goldberg said. "Absolutely not a bad word. It simply means a black person."

To counter Goldberg, O'Reilly resorted to a tactic he rarely uses -- facts. Bill read the definition of the word in a dictionary and found that "shvartze" is "often disparaging and offensive to a black person."

Goldberg's defense? The dictionary was too liberal.

I'd write a punchline, but who needs a punchline? (Raw Story, with video)

-Newsflash: Lou Dobbs is a dick-
Many wonder whether CNN's resident Mexican-hater Lou Dobbs is just crazy. Wonder no more. Lou Dobbs doesn't just hate Mexicans, he doesn't just hate other ethnic groups, he hates ethnicity itself -- as well as knowledge of those ethnicities.

On his radio show yesterday, Dobbs went fullblown 19th century by attacking the Irish -- specifically, that weird Irish holiday of "St. Patrick's Day." Lou called St. Pat's a needless "ethnic holiday."

"How about an American day?" Lou asked. There is one. It's kind of obscure and happens in early July. A lot of people celebrate it by blowing stuff up.

"Is there a Jewish ethnic holiday? Is there one? No. Okay," Lou went on. "How about an Asian ethnic holiday? Is there one? You know, St. Jing-Tao-Wow?" People love that Ching-chong ethnic humor, Lou. Your retro, 1940s-style, Charlie Chan racism so rocks.

Besides, everyone knows that Jews and Asians don't celebrate holidays that would -- for the sake of argument -- be known by exotic names like "Chinese New Year" or "Yom Kippur." Only the dirty Irish with their beer and leprechauns and magic beans or whatever the hell St. Pat's is about get a holiday. It's patently un-American.

Next thing you know, those Mexicans, Italians, and Norwegians will get their own holidays. Then where will we be?

Up the Melting Pot River without a good ol' American racist paddle, that's where. (Think Progress, with audio)

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