News Roundup for 4/30/10

Much better than giving a fuck about your gas mileage

-Headline of the day-
"Obama won't back off drilling plans, but pledges safeguards."

A big flaming wreck, millions of gallons of oil pumping out in to the Gulf of Mexico, 11 dead, the destruction of wetlands, and an end to the tourism industry in the region? Yeah, it's totally worth it to get that half-hour's worth of oil off the coast. A minor setback, really. Don't worry too much about it.

Never mind that this one rig is expected to cause damage in the billions of dollars, while never pumping enough oil to cover that cost. Cost-benefit analysis? Who needs it? We've got Republicans to mollify, because they're absolutely committed to bipartisanship, so long as we give one of their stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid ideas a spin. It'll be safe from now on, because we'll learn from our mistakes -- just like we did the last time we totally ruined a huge chunk of the environment. That taught us so many lessons that we now find ourselves in a nearly identical situation.

Leadership means making the tough decisions. As well as the fuckwitted ones. (McClatchy)


-Saving a different environment-
Here's what everyone needs -- a fart-eating blanket.

I feel the need to point out that this is 100% real. Will it sell as well as the Snuggie? There are pros and cons here. Pro: the Snuggie is basically a robe you wear backwards, offering the least possible protection against flatulence. It's open at the back, so any toxic emissions vent freely out into the atmosphere.

Cons: as user "Munroman" points out in the comment thread at Youtube, "Whats the point? Why even fart if she can't smell it?"

Well played, Munroman. I believe this round goes to you. (Huffington Post)


-Bonus HotD-
"Boehner takes credit for ideas in health law, then calls for its repeal."

The Republican Party; as hopelessly incoherent as ever. (Think Progress, with video)