News Roundup for 8/27/09

Gary Bauer
Either Gary Bauer or the Nibelung dwarf Alberich from that Wagner opera

-Headline of the day-
"Bauer: It's Not Torture, It's a Frat Party!"

Weird little right wing goblin Gary Bauer thinks that the Obama administration is getting out of hand in its definition of torture. "Even things like depriving a prisoner of sleep or playing loud music would no longer be allowed. Depriving people of sleep and playing loud music -- that's a fraternity party!" says Bauer at right wing news site OneNewsNow. "This administration is now so defining torture down that we're now including things that are absolutely absurd."

Ha ha! Yes! The White House is getting crazy about what they call torture. Let's all laugh at them! Hahaha!

Of course, this does beg the question -- what the hell are we doing throwing big parties for terr'ists, Gary? Do you really believe they deserve that? Apparently, you do. Because I'm not seeing anything that suggests you want these parties to stop.

So why does Gary Bauer want to throw parties for terr'ists? Does he hate America? I can only assume so. Never trust a wingnut who looks like a cross between Peter Lorre and Gollum.

Actually, just never trust a wingnut. (Right Wing Watch)

-Making up new ways to die-
Death panels are so five minutes ago. All the cool kids are making up new imaginary ways to die at the hands of a godless communist government. People receiving the Republican National Committee's "2009 Future of American Health Survey" have something else to freak out about -- Democrats will use healthcare reform to kill Republicans.

A question in the survey asks, "It has been suggested that the government could use voter registration to determine a person's political affiliation, prompting fears that GOP voters might be discriminated against for medical treatment in a Democrat-imposed health care rationing system. Does this concern you?"

Of course, this is just something someone in the RNC's propaganda shop pulled out of their ass. Surveys like this are called "push polling" and are meant to suggest that something's common knowledge or, at least, true. Generally, they show up around election time, in the form of a phone call asking, "And knowing that ____ eats live babies, how much would you say this affects your vote?"

So the GOP is trying to start a new rumor about a new way that healthcare reform might kill you. This is another story that begs a question:

Knowing that Republicans are fearmongering jerks, would you say you trust them only as far as you could throw one, trust them only so far as you could throw them collectively, or do you just want to grab one and throw them?

Take your time. There are no wrong answers. (Washington Independent)

-That's not what you said before-
According to the Express-Star, Sen. James Inhofe (R-OK) isn't going to read the final healthcare bill. "I don't have to read it, or know what's in it," Inhofe said. "I'm going to oppose it anyways."

Always nice to have an open mind, huh?

The problem is that way back in June, Inhofe was one of two senators -- the other was Jim DeMint (R-SC) -- who pledged to the organization Let Freedom Ring that they'd absolutely, positively read the bill.

Of course, LFR is against healthcare reform and the idea was that, at over 1,000 pages, the bill would be too massive for anyone to ever read. And that would kill the bill. In wingnut arithmetic, 1000=infinity -- they'd never finish, so there'd never be a vote. It'd be a clever plan if it didn't hinge on being mathematically illiterate.

So it's super-important to read the whole thing if you're planning to vote for it, but if you're going to vote against it, then ignorance is bliss. No one ever accused Republicans of being consistent in their reasoning. Or of reasoning. Of course, this would make James Inhofe a liar, but we're not supposed to keep track of the stuff these guys actually say. Then we'd expect them to keep their promises.

Want to take bets on how many wingnut town hall shriekers will stand outside Inhofe's office and yell, "READ THE BILL! READ THE BILL!"?

My money's on zero. (Political Wire, Politico)

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