News Roundup for 8/21/09

Michele Bachmann
Concerned about government molestation

-Headline of the day-
"Bachmann: No Government Control Over My Body!"

Uber-feminist Rep. Michele Bachmann (R-Crazytown) wants big government's hands off her. My body, my choice! My body, my choice!

"[P]eople need to continue to go to the town halls, continue to melt the phone lines of their liberal members of Congress," said Shelly, "and let them know, under no certain circumstances will I give the government control over my body and my health care decisions."

OK, she doesn't get points for technically correct use of the English language, but cut her slack for having a Crazytown accent. She wants big gummint out of her bedroom and out of her uterus! Abortion rights, w00t!

Wait... On second glance it looks like she's against big gummint meddling to make sure she's healthy. Big gummint on your back is totally fine if it's also on your... Well, you know. You don't want a government bureaucrat between you and your doctor, you want an insurance company bureaucrat between you and your doctor -- unless, of course, your doctor performs abortions. Then yay for government bureaucracy! It's what the founders wanted.

Remember kids, getting healthcare from the government and being able to make your own choices is "tyranny," but being forced to remain pregnant against your will while you have no healthcare coverage is "liberty." This is because guys like Jefferson, Madison, and Washington were all batshit crazy and had no idea how to speak English. Like Shelly Bachmann. Or Ron Paul.

You know, given the choice, I'll go ahead and take the tyranny. (Talking Points Memo, with clip)

-You're doing it wrong-
Greg Sargent notices something in current poll numbers for the president and Democrats. Turns out they're falling. Why doesn't the media tell us things like this?

A new Research2000 poll show net favorables (the difference between favorable and unfavorable numbers) falling for both -- among Democratic voters. Here's the breakdown for the prez (parenthetical ratings are from last week):

DEMOCRATS: +72 (+78)
REPUBLICANS: - 86 (- 84)

Obama loses six points among dems. And Democrats in congress?

DEMOCRATS: +55 (+65)
REPUBLICANS: - 90 (- 90)
INDEPENDENTS: - 20 (- 15)

Down ten among Democrats.

How's that "bipartisanship" working for you guys? (Plum Line)

-Speaking of bipartisanship...-
Here's Senate minority whip John Kyl earlier this week; "almost all Republicans" are likely to oppose any healthcare reform bill.

Kyl yesterday; "For either the bill that passed the House Committee or the bill that passed the HELP committee in the Senate, I don't think a single Republican in the Senate would support either of those bills."

For the love of God, stop beating that bipartisan horse! It's dead. Gone. Finished. Deceased. Expired. Passed on. Met its maker. Taking the big sleep. Pushing up daisies. Belly up. Planted. Gone to the great beyond. Getting pretty ripe. Moved on from this veil of tears. An ex-parrot. Escaped this world of sorrow. In a better place. Gone to live on a farm upstate.

There are five stages of grief. If you guys can't get past denial, you're never going to be able to move on and get on with your lives. (Political Animal)

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