News Roundup for 3/10/09

Senator on way to work

-Headline of the day-
"Coal ash spill may reach Washington, DC."

A "dime-sized" hole in a Maryland pipeline released about 4,000 gallons of toxic coal ash before it was discovered on March 9. It developed the night before and pumped out sludge into the Potomac all night before it was detected. Maybe someone ought to kind of keep an eye on these things.

Anyway, the sludge spill could reach as far as the nation's capital. "I don’t know how long it’ll take for the spill to reach DC proper, but its a hell of a way to send a message about how much we need to regulate the handling of this stuff," says the Natural Resource Defense Council's Pete Altman. "All the more reason to thank the Obama Administration for announcing plans to propose federal regulations for coal waste."

Typical socialist rhetoric. The invisible hand of the free market will come along and clean everything up spic and span.

Let's just hope the invisible hand of the free market wears a glove. (Think Progress)


-Republican strategery-
Have you ever wondered why Republicans are so super-successful in everything they do? Have you ever wanted that success for yourself? Presenting Tom Tomorrow's "GOP Strategies for Success!"



That's right, you too can be as successful as the Republican party! Complete with such brilliant tips as "Blame victims," "Stand up for the big guys," "Insist that failed policies will work if tried again," and -- my personal favorite -- "Embrace ignorance":



It's so simple even a child could do it and comes with a free spiral slicer (a $19.95 value)! Anyone who says these strategies won't work is a commie terr'ist 'merica-hater (#10 "Remember: nothing wins voters over like hysterical paranoia!").

Now watch the votes come rollin' in... (Salon)


-Jim's got a secret-
Kentucky Republican Sen. Jim Bunning. who many believe will have a tough fight (read, "no chance in hell") to hold onto his seat in 2010, took a poll to find out just what his prospects really are. What were the results?

Y'got me. Bunning won't release the numbers. "Let's say I did the polling... That means it's none of your god damn business," Bunning said when asked about it by a reporter. "If you paid the 20 grand for the poll, you can get some information out of it."

Sounds like the numbers look just freakin' awesome doesn't it? (Political Wire)