News Roundup for 10/11/09

Sen. Coburn to veterans: "Blow me, losers"

-Headline of the day-
"GOP's Coburn 'is denying veterans many benefits and services.'"

Sen. Tom Coburn (R-OK) wishes you a Happy Veterans Day!

Now go fuck off, you shiftless veterans...

According to the Tulsa World, "Oklahoma junior Republican U.S. Sen. Tom Coburn has put a hold on a bill that would, among other things, help our veterans pay for home care. Coburn feels that the bill is too costly and is demanding cuts in other programs to balance the cost of the veterans bill."

Yup, Coburn thinks it cost too much money to help vets who been injured or disabled serving in Republican wars. So he's holding up paying for it, until someone can show how to pay for it. How we can pay for war is another question, of course. Always plenty of money for that.

Sen. Daniel Akaka (D-HI) points out that this probably isn't the best thing to do for veterans, saying "it would be truly disgraceful" if the bill didn't pass on Veterans Day.

"This single senator is denying veterans many benefits and services," Akaka said, adding that it provides care for the "most seriously wounded veterans." Well, today's Veterans Day, Coburn still has a hold on the bill and the rest of the Republican Party isn't doing a damned thing about it.

If you see Tom Coburn today, feel free to give him the finger. Hell, give him two. And, if you're planning on voting for Coburn in 2010, I got an interesting question for you; what the fuck is wrong with you?

If you could go ahead and answer that for me, that'd be great. (AMERICAblog)

-News you can't possibly use-
Writing for Time, Mark Halperin answers the question, "What's In Sarah Palin's Book?" with, "I Don't Really Know."

With advance copies going out to Palin buddies -- which doesn't include Halperin -- people are wondering what's in it. So Mark dug into his Rolodex of Palin sources and asked around. He found out that Sarah's mad at the media, didn't like McCain aides, and includes "a testimonial to the importance of faith in her life."

Dude, I could've got that information just by guessing.

Still, a TIME.com blog post titled, "What's In Sarah Palin's Book?" is bound to get a lot of traffic from wingnuts googling the most obvious search query - "What's In Sarah Palin's Book?" But it'd be cynical of me to think that was the whole reason for the post. (TIME, via Wonkette)

-Bonus HotD-
"Tampa police: Marine reservist attacked Greek priest he mistook for terrorist."

The price of freedom is eternal vigilance and Marine reservist Jasen Bruce proved he was willing to pay that price when he assaulted a Greek Orthodox priest in Florida Monday because he thought he was a Muslim terr'ist. What made Bruce think that? The guy talked funny.

According to the report, "[The] man, a Greek Orthodox priest named Father Alexios Marakis, speaks little English and was lost, police said. He wanted directions." So Bruce did the obvious thing and whacked him with a tire iron. Even better, he chased the guy for three blocks and called 911, to report the terr'ist.

Suprisingly, when the cops showed up, they arrested the hero/patriot. At this point, he had a bunch of explanations for his actions:

The man tried to rob him.

The man grabbed Bruce's crotch and made an overt sexual advance in perfect English.

The man yelled "Allahu Akbar," Arabic for "God is great," the same words some witnesses said the Fort Hood shooting suspect uttered last week.

"That's what they tell you right before they blow you up," police say Bruce told them.

America's greatest patriot "ended up in jail, accused of aggravated battery with a deadly weapon."

"Marakis ended up at the hospital with stitches," the paper reports. "He told the police he didn't want to press charges, espousing biblical forgiveness."

For his part, super-patriot Jasen Bruce isn't apologizing. You win this round, Greek Orthodox Muslim terr'ists. But next time, you won't be so lucky.

Teabags forver! w00t! (St. Petersburg Times, via Talking Points Memo)

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