News Roundup for 5/17/10

Barack Obama

-Headline of the day-
"Glenn Beck's war on the FCC (and Satan worshippers)."

Glenn Beck's discovered a new way that Obama is trying to destroy America -- net neutrality. Turns out that Obama's a "Satan worshiper" -- because I guess "the new Hitler" isn't bad enough -- and he wants to change the way the internet works in order to shut down critics of his Satanic agenda.

"We are dealing with people who think they should rebel until they get their little kingdom like Satan did," Glenn says. "You know what? Thanks, Mr. President, but I think we're going to keep the Internet the way it is right now. You know or at least until people who are worshiping Satan, you know, aren't in office."

You know what? Net neutrality is about keeping the internet the way it is. It's the people who are against NN who are the ones who want to change things. Turns out that Glenn's got this whole thing completely backwards. Glenn told his audience of homebound mental patients that neutrality is a "boot on your throat" to make the internet "a public utility" -- which, as a network set up by the government to share data, it kind of already is.

So there you go. Wanting all info on the internet to be transmitted without restriction is a way to silence critics. And Obama's going to do that by having the government take over the internet -- which the government built. Plus, the White House is filled with Satan worshipers.

Do people really take this squirrelly SOB seriously? (Ars Technica)


-Crazy AZ-
I always thought that Sean Connery cast as a Rooshin shubmarine commandah was pretty funny. But this is even better:

Pretty much says it all. (Youtube, via Huffington Post)


-Bonus HotD-
"Here's my 2012 presidential ticket."

Idle hands are the Devil's workshop, so founder of the rightwing nutjob site WorldNetDaily, noted homosexual Joseph Farah, is wasting no time making his endorsement for the 2012 Republican presidential ticket.

The biggest surprise here is that Sarah Palin is out. Turns out that endorsing John McCain over teaebagger candidate J.D. Hayworth has proved her to be insufficiently crazy. And Mitt Romney's all Mormon, so he's out too. So Farah whittled his list down to two people who haven't even said they were thinking about running -- Sen. Jim Demint and Rep. Michele Bachmann.

If you're looking for a team who are sufficiently crazy, you really couldn't do much better. Pay heed. Republican voters. The Mighty Joseph Farah has spoken! Nominate these two lunatics and do the Democratic Party the biggest favor anyone ever did for them. (WorldNetDaily)