News Roundup for 1/19/12

Every bit the prick he appears to be

-Headline of the Day-
"Limbaugh On Gingrich Cheating On His Ex-Wife: 'Newt's A Victim.'"

Poor Newt Gingrich. All he wanted to do was get little extra love on the side and all of a sudden he's the bad guy. It's so unfair.

See, Newt's ex-wife sat down with ABC News for an as-yet unaired interview. But what we know about what she said is not good for Newt. Basically, after she was diagnosed with MS, Newt decided it was time to look elsewhere for the lovin' -- because he's great like that. That "elsewhere" is now his wife. You know, the weird-eyed robot lady Callista.

Anyway, the ex -- Marianne -- says that Newt wanted to have his cake and eat it too (sorry about that image, it's just a figure of speech). She says he approached her about having an "open marriage" and she shot him down.

According to Rush Limbaugh, Newt is awesome. So he took to the airwaves to defend the honor of America's Greatest Living Hero the only way a conservative seems to know how these days -- with a quick flip of the victim card. "I got a great note from a friend of mine," Rush told his breathless audience of shut-ins, mental patients, and people whose radios only get that one station. "'So Newt wanted an open marriage. BFD. At least he asked his wife for permission instead of cheating on her. That’s a mark of character, in my book. Newt’s a victim."

Slight problem with the phrase "instead of," though. Rush must've confused it with "while." Because the sentence, "At least he asked his wife for permission while cheating on her," is more in line with reality. According to the report, "It’s worth noting that Gingrich had been having an affair for several years before he asked 'permission' to cheat on his wife."

Then again, being a master of spin has nothing to do with mastery of the facts. (ThinkProgress)


-Cartoon time with Mark Fiore-
Hey kids, Snuggly the Security Bear is back and he's here to talk about piracy! Arrr!!


Click for animation

So remember, when you burn a CD, you're being exactly like those pirates in Somalia. Die, buccaneer scum! (MarkFiore.com)


-Bonus HotD-
"Walker turning down $37 million for health care."

I'll be so glad when we recall this moron. (Associated Press)