News Roundup for 12/16/10

Sen. DeMint is proud to be an asshole

-Headline of the Day-
"GOP will paralyze Senate floor with reading of 1,924-page spending bill."

According to the report, "Republicans will paralyze the Senate floor for 50 hours by forcing clerks to read every single paragraph of the 1,924-page, $1.1 trillion omnibus spending bill." Why? Because they're assholes, that's why. Seriously, ask the asshole whose idea this was.

"Again, we're trying to run out the clock," says Republican asshole Jim DeMint. "They should not be able to pass this kind of legislation in a lame-duck Congress."

Why are Democrats trying to pass such massive legislation in a lame-duck session? Because Republicans were assholes before this. These are all appropriations and spending bills passed by the House of Representatives that the Senate hasn't gotten to yet, because Republican assholes have been abusing the filibuster so much that the chamber is now 1,924 pages behind. And here's DeMint, still being an asshole and still trying to hold up this legislation.

And here's the thing: it's pointless. There's no way this will take the whole rest of the session to read. And, even if it did, Democrats will still rule the Senate next year. This thing is a sure bet to pass.

Still, for some insane reason, Senators have the right to ask that a bill be read out loud in its entirety. I propose a new rule: the Senator making that request has to sit there and listen to the whole thing. If he or she leaves the Senate floor --even for a moment -- the request is considered withdrawn, people take their thumbs out of their butts, and everyone gets back to business.

Give a Republican just one day of having to pee in a 2 liter Mountain Dew jug and this will never happen again. GOPers talk tough, but they're really pansies. (The Hill)


-Cartoon time with Mark Fiore-
Hey kids, Rep. John Boehner's here to show you that it's OK for boys to cry!


Click for animation

OK, let me change that -- it's OK for boys to cry about the right things. Forget what John said there... (MarkFiore.com)


-Bonus HotD-
"John Boehner's Crying: Is He Drinking Too Much?"

Yes. (Politics Daily)