News Roundup for 2/17/12

You probably don't want to know what's rolling around in this guy's head

-Headline of the Day-
"Santorum On Firestorm Over Friess: 'This Is Just Crap.'"

Rick Santorum's Sugar Daddy Foster Friess got himself in a little trouble when he told MSNBC's Andrea Mitchell that back in his day, women used to use aspirin as birth control. "The gals put it between their knees and it wasn’t that costly," he said. This didn't go over real well. Even if you cut him just a buttload of slack, you've really got to admit that going on cable news to tell dirty jokes probably isn't the smartest thing ever. Offensive dirty jokes... Well, that's just going in the wrong direction entirely.

But Rick isn't going to sit back while his piggy bank good buddy gets well-deserved criticism from the media. No sirree Bob. He's fighting back the only way a good conservative knows how -- by playing the living shit out of the victim card. He told the wingnut National Review that he's "not going to put up with it."

"You know, [reporters] sit there and they say nothing, while for 20 years [President Obama] sits in a church with a guy who is a racist," Santorum says. "And somehow or another Foster Friess is now who I am? This is just crap."


Wait, what? Jeremiah Wright was a racist? I don't remember that. I remember a guy saying a lot of things that conservatives didn't like much, but racism?

So I did what good bloggers do; I checked. Turns out that the charge of racism comes from a wingnut chain email. Yeah, one of those. It said that only black people were allowed to attend Trinity Church of Christ. That's about as true as the other claim in the email that Barack Obama's middle name is "Mohammed." It also has some great birther stuff in it -- "secret Muslim" crap that makes no sense at all in connection with attending a Christian Church. It's just typical frothing, fringe-looney BS.

And this just popped into Rick's head? You've got to wonder what other lunatic items are rattling around in there. (Talking Points Memo)


-Cartoon time with Mark Fiore-
Hey kids, you've probably heard about this contraception thingy. It's all very complicated and adult, but some Bishops are here to explain it. Yay!



Click for animation

Remember, no one's a better expert on birth control than some celibate guy who can't even get married. (MarkFiore.com)


-Bonus HotD-
"Another Romney 'Victory' Could Become Hollow."

You remember how Mitt Romney won Iowa -- and then he didn't and Rick Santorum won?

Now it's looking like Mittens won Maine -- and then he didn't and Ron Paul won. It's still all up in the air, but it really could turn out that way.

Remember, Republican election officials can't find their own asses with both hands, a flashlight, a map, and a GPS -- but we need voter ID because screwed up elections are your fault. (Political Animal)